I had fallen out of love: a post by Kate Motaung

on Dec 12, 2016 in Blog | 8 comments

Today Kate shares her Breathe Story. Maybe 2017 is the year you fall back in love with writing. Take a solid first step and register for Breathe today! Now until January 2, 2017 registration is just $120. Join us! 


In October 2015, I pulled open the glass door and stepped into my first ever writing conference.write-like-youre

The only soul I knew in the sea of mingling people was my acquisitions editor, who I had met once at Panera. I made a beeline for his familiar face and locked into conversation.

The theme that year was “Awaken Your Wonder.” After soaking up the amazing breakout and keynote sessions, my wonder was sufficiently awakened. I floated home on a cloud of blissful wonder over the world of writing and all of its glorious possibilities.

Fast forward one year, and the scene is much different. In the span of 12 months, I signed a book contract; signed with an agent; spent five months revising my memoir manuscript; registered a writing, editing and virtual assistance business; and started working full-time from home for eleven different clients.

I strolled through those glass doors at the 2016 Breathe conference with a writing friend by my side and immediately recognized at least a dozen faces.

What a difference a year can make, right?

But in the process of doing, doing, doing for a year straight – of setting goals, meeting deadlines, creating web content, strategizing marketing plans – I had lost the wonder of it all. I had forgotten to celebrate story. Without realizing it, I had fallen out of love.

I sat in the auditorium listening to James Scott Bell breathe new life into my tired heart:

“Whenever you write, wherever you write—write like you’re in love.”

Yes. That’s what I want to remember. That’s what I want to feel again.  

As he closed his moving keynote speech, I felt as if he was pointing his words directly at me:

“Fall in love with the craft. Fall in love with your gift of writing.”

That’s what I’ve been missing these past few months. I truly love the craft. I love the gift. I love my job. But the pressures of commercial work had subtly drained the passion right out of my tank.

Thank you, Mr. Bell, for filling it up again.  

Kate MKate Motaung grew up on the shores of Lake Michigan before spending ten years in Cape Town, South Africa. She and her South African husband have three children. Kate is the author of the ebook, Letters to Grief, hosts the Five Minute Friday blog link-up, and has contributed to several other online publications. She blogs at Heading Home and can be found on Twitter @k8motaung or on Facebook. Kate owns Refine Services, LLC, a writing, editing and virtual assistance business. She is represented by Credo Communications, and her memoir is forthcoming from Discovery House. 


  1. Kate, I’m with you! I can see distinct seasons when I have fallen out of love with my craft. Those are struggle times for sure. But when I allow myself to fall in love again, it’s beautiful. Not always easier. But so much more delightful.

    Thank you for sharing with us!!!


    December 12, 2016

    • “Not always easier. But much more delightful.” Great perspective, Susie! Thank you for hosting me here!

      Kate Motaung

      December 12, 2016

  2. Kate, This is so beautiful. I will remind myself of these words over the next year.

    Heather Tuba

    December 12, 2016

    • Thank you for taking the time to read and comment, Heather! Hope you have a blessed Christmas!

      Kate Motaung

      December 12, 2016

  3. Kate, thank you for sharing your journey with us. Writing is so much like a marriage, isn’t it? It’s tempting to just go through the motions, but then we miss the heart of it. I hope to have a lifelong love affair with writing. And James Scott Bell was wonderful!

    Ingrid Lochamire

    December 12, 2016

    • Great analogy, Ingrid — and so true! Thanks for your input!

      Kate Motaung

      December 12, 2016

  4. Thanks for this insight, Kate. Experiencing a dry spell in my relationship with writing was one of the reasons I started participating in your Five Minute Fridays. Even though I am writing on consignment more now than I was a year ago, I am writing less often simply to satisfy my hunger and passion for the process. FMF guarantees me one burst of “WOW, I LOVE BEING A WRITER!!”, giddy enthusiasm at least once a week. I know the love is still there, and in time it will seep back to the surface. Thank you for FMF’s role in bringing that about.


    December 12, 2016

  5. Nice post Kate. I felt the same way when I heard him say those words.

    Michelle Alvarez

    December 13, 2016

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